The real melting pot of America isn’t fancy. No, America’s true melting pot is a gas station, and make no mistake, all roads lead here. The gas station is the only place where upside down is right-side up. The billionaire waits behind the butler. The janitor gets served before the…

Ask and you shall receive. Somewhere deep in the hall of questions, past the sleeping security guard, and tucked away under three-inch-thick glass, there lies a question that’s haunted humanity since the beginning of time. What should I do with my life? Seven words that can make empires rise and…

Success doesn’t look like the pictures. If you spend approximately one minute online searching for images of success, you’ll think you’re watching a Hollywood movie: You’ll see James Bond lookalikes posing with Lamborghinis. You’ll notice houses the size of hills resting in the countryside. And someway, somehow, none of these…

Every time I see someone refer to themselves as a gifted creative, I want to throw up. It’s not that I don’t admire creative people (I do), appreciate the creative arts (I do), or have an undiagnosed stomach issue that makes going out to dinner with me a living nightmare…

How to be unlucky on St. Patrick’s Day — You saw Armageddon in her eyes. She was standing in the stairwell, dressed in green, smelling like she took a Jamison shower. Her orange curly hair poured out and fell onto her ‘Kiss Me I’m Irish’ shirt, which was covered with enough beads to rival the gold at the end…

Welcome to the American nightmare — The coup d’etat happened in an instant. Jenn accessed her family’s Hulu account, located her sister Sarah’s email, and with a triumphant, extended forefinger, deleted her ass right into the abyss. She smiled as she imagined her sister’s sudden and probably horrified reaction to the news. Fresh blood was in…

As usual, it started innocently enough… It’s 11 AM on a Tuesday when you get a text inviting you over for a game night. You think it’s harmless. Nice even. It’s from a friend of a friend in a group chat that you hardly contribute to, but for some reason…

It’s a quiet night in Iowa when the phone rings… Bill curses from under his breath and glances away from the TV. Who on earth could have the audacity to call at this hour? He heaves himself off the couch and staggers towards the phone mounted on the wall. Bill? Bill! What…WHAT! Bill! Hey, are you alright? Yeah, what’s the…

You’re driving in rush hour traffic when the inevitable strikes: You have to change lanes. You’re stuck behind a minivan who’s competing for the honor of being the world’s slowest driver. And for the briefest of moments, you could almost call it an instant, you think about killing yourself. You…